Signs You May Need a New Job Soon
11. The security guards begin wearing body armor.
10. They turn off your computer after 1:00pm to “save on electricity.”
9. They move your desk to the basement and take away your red Swingline stapler.
8. You’re listed as part as the inventory.
7. Your CEO just fell past your window.
6. Your new business cards now have an expiration date.
5. The cafeteria menus now say “Food May Contain 10% Recycled Content” in tiny letters at the bottom of each page.
4. There’s a meeting on the schedule for “Employee Liquidation.”
3. The people in Human Resources start acting really nice to you.
2. Your boss asks if your skill set includes cock fighting.
1. Your boss says “Remember, there is no u in team.”
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